Tuesday, November 1, 2011

The Rest of the Story....

Remember him and his 'rest of the story'?
If not, you are too damned young.

I've received a few emails asking me about the outcome of this or that.  I tend to keep posting about current events but don't follow up with older ones.  To that end.....for my nice readers (no not YOU) here are a few 'rest of the stories'.

The rest of the bus incident story......
Remember when a kid got kicked off of my bus for being a buck short and I paid for him?  The bus driver and I had always had a good rapport prior to this.  You know....kind of like how the Soup Nazi had customers who knew what to do.  That's me!  I pay quickly, efficiently and always with a please and thank you.

The day after the incident however, I didn't know what to expect. I got on board, smiled and said hello and he said hi back.

So far, so good!

Instead of getting my usual seat at the back of the bus, I opted for the very first seat behind the driver.....just in case there was another hassle.  Yeah, I know I'm not the bus police, believe me!  However, I got involved and just wanted to be sure the boys made it on the bus.  They got on, paid the whole fare, and there was no drama at all.  Woot!

I'm back to sitting in my good ole seat and reading throughout the ride and the boys seem to be getting on just fine.  The young one always says hello to me.  And the driver?  He couldn't be nicer!  When he arrives at my station he always seems to stop right in front of me, so I can get my coveted seat.  Happy ending!

The rest of the Rude Comment Story....
Last week I alluded to a rude comment that a guy made to me recently at Foxwoods, which resulted in emails asking me for details.  Yes, he was rude!  I don't know if it was really the rudest comment I've ever received.  I'll let you decide. And yeah, I know, I'm asking for it, blah, blah, blah.  In March 2010, I wrote about a similar incident entitled NIP.  If you haven't already read that post, I suggest you do.  "That's gold, Jerry!  Gold!"  (if you're too old to get Seinfeld references, leave!) 

Okay, the rest of the rude comment story.....
I just joined the 1-2NL game in the 1 seat and there was a youngish guy in 4 seat, pretty much opposite me.  I'd guess he was mebbe 28 yrs old.  He was wearing a black t-shirt which was absolutely covered in big shiny rhinestones, so much so it was blinding.  Holy shit!  He was one of those young, thinks he's great, kinda players.  I'd won a pot or two off of him, natch, and made a comment that soon enough I'd be winning his pretty t-shirt too.  His reply was something like if I went back to his room with him, he'd give it to me.  Blah.  That shut me up for a bit.  So we're playing along and I get A-A.  Heh.  I raise it up to $10 and when it's to him, he jams all in.  Everyone folds and with a big cheesy grin I call.  He asks me if I have pocket aces and I confirm it, yet....he doesn't quite believe me.  Imagine!  I nicely flip them both over preflop and soon enough I am happily stacking all of his chips while he reloads.  Thankfully A-A held up against K-Q.  Nothing's a sure thing in poker.

So he's reloading and flashing lots of hundys and then says to me "I don't know why you're playing here.  What are you hoping to win?  A couple hundred dollars?" 

Um, yes.

I'm offering you $500 right now.  $500 for three hours.

What????

Honest to God.  $500 for 3 hours but it'll be recorded.

(he's obv trying to embarrass me)

Um, no.  I can win $500 here in LESS than 3 hours.

But he just won't stop. He continues on about how he makes porn movies, yes porn movies, and I would be perfect for a particular one.  He says "Come on.  You and me, we make a MILF movie.  $500 for only 3 hours. You'll have a good time."

"No thanks Bitch" was my response.  This conversation has ENDED.

Then he continues with "I offended you cuz I said you'd be in a MILF movie? Are you trying to tell me you're NOT a mother?"

Oh, I am.

"Well then, I was right.  I could see you getting mad if I put you in the Cougar category, but I said MILF".

Then the nice older guy in seat to says to me "What's a milf?"  Dear God, let it stop.  My face was a pretty shade of crimson.

Later on, a very feminine man visits Mr. Rhinestones and asks for money.  He gives him a few hundred, and away he skips.

"I guess you make gay moves too, huh?"  The whole table burst out laughing as he confirms, that yes he does.

Fast forward a couple of weeks and I'm visiting Poker Dave in the $1,500 tourney.  Mind you, I'm in my 'butch' red sox gear and as I'm walking toward Dave, I hear "$500 for 3 hours.  The offer still stands!"

I stop dead in my tracks.  It's him!  His whole table is looking at me as I beat the crap out of him.  Literally!  I must've slapped him like 6 times.  When I finish he says "Is that a yes?"

I had one more 'rest of the story' to tell you, but this is getting long.

Play smart.

Josie


21 comments:

SirFWALGMan said...

Im on the fence. LOL. I would think you would LOVE the offer... not take it mind you.. heh.

bastinptc said...

Mr. Rhinestones is headed for a lot worse than being slapped. Very cinematic, though; scripted, even.

Josie said...

@Waffles - this is proof that you don't know dick. (or me)

@bastin - I agree he's like a train wreck in the making. Cinematic? that's good right?

Memphis MOJO said...

"$500 for 3 hours. The offer still stands!"

Classic!

Josie said...

LOL I doubt I'D be standing after 3 hrs. heh.

KenP said...

"Is that a yes?"

Seeing we old ones don't have an idea what MILF is, maybe an answer here might avoid misunderstanding.

I won't call your life accident prone but there is something strange at work.

Josie does Joplin?

Josie said...

@ken, something tells me you do know what a milf is. if not, i suggest google. as to the rest of your comment, i have no idea what the heck you're talking about.

im not accident prone...and josie does joplin? you've totally lost me. is that like debbie does dallas but with janice joplin, who A.) is dead and B.) is a woman and C.) Huh?????

Memphis MOJO said...

"Seeing we old ones don't have an idea what MILF is,"

Heh, heh, Ken acting like he doesn't go to porn sites.

Josie said...

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLL I <3 Mojo

lightning36 said...

The term MILF actually became really popular after the movie American Pie came out. I get the feeling a least a few of the guys who post here have felt the ol' apple pie before ...

As for the offers, Josie ... in this case I shall be Silent Lightning -- often seen but never heard ...

Josie said...

What offers lightning? It seems that I am the one who doesn't understand!

btw I like silent Lightning! Could this be a new thing? :)

genomeboy said...

Frankly, I don't understand why you are offended by that. If someone offered to pay me to do straight porn, I'd be flattered. I'd decline, but still be flattered...

Josie said...

Oh geonome boy, and I do mean BOY....as I mentioned in the post, he was trying to embarrass me, which he did. He was also trying to intimate that I'd be better served to be on my back with legs spread instead of at the felt. whatever.

It was rude, not flattering. Surely if you're trying to flatter a woman, you do not start with '$500 for 3 hours' do you? I sincerely hope not.

I think, in his own weird way, maybe he was trying to impress me?
Who knows.

Josie said...

Genome, since we're talking about it....the other guy....the one from the Nip story....he was sincere, LOL, if that's the right word. He was the personification of horniness and man, he was acting like he would die if I didn't drop my top.

Men...

Cranky said...

Josie - you are so right (in your comment to genome boy). This was a power play, trying to humiliate you. You beat him soundly at poker, not just the AA hand but others previously. He wanted to put you down by turning you into a whore. And filming it for public viewing no less.

Only a man would think his comment was a compliment. Sheesh!

Josie said...

Yes Cranky, it happened after I'd felted him with AA. It was most likely a reaction to losing and yeah, losing sucks.

I said it was rude and that it embarrassed me....I wouldn't go so far as to say it offended me. I do feel that he was trying to put me in my place and it didn't work. When I ran in to him a couple weeks later, yeah I smacked him a round, but it was friendly and with smiling faces. Had he really offended me, it wouldn't have been that way.

Gary said...

I would imagine that the video would be you on your back with your legs spread ON the felt. The pun titles write themselves - "poke her at the casino" and the like...

Josie said...

Gary, thank you for that.

Mikeg5162000 said...

Funniest Post ever! I an almost see you slapping him around while no one stops you since everyone probably already considers him to be a dick. The old guy asking you what is a MILF was perfect. It was probably all designed to get you off your game.

Josie said...

thanks mike! Although the old man seemed to genuinely not understand and wanted to know what was going on.

welcome to my world! sheesh!

sebszebra said...

I am reminded of the tale of the British schoolboy who thought MILF was just a general insult, and after being annoyed by his mother described her to friends as, "a right MILF". That is about as embarrassing as calling the Headmistress "Mummy" in front of the entire school in Assembly - that was the end of my teaching career. (Bom-bom!)