Friday, April 29, 2011

What I did on my spring vacation....

Now that Full Tilt is kaput I have to focus my energies somewhere and right now it's a tie between two things...exercising and sleeping.  I had been surviving on maybe 5-6 hrs of sleep per night and sometimes less if engrossed in a MTT, but now I sleept at least 9 hrs every night!  Sometimes more!  I wonder if the  increased exercise is a factor.  Took another power hike and went even further than last night.  My knees seem to be able to take it, so I think it's key to continue.  I had one person/car beeping and frantically waving.  I think it was my son's friend's mother, but really, who knows? 

I find that between the sleeping and the exercising I really don't miss Full Tilt as much as I thought I would.  Although I did receive the following email that got me thinking.....

So are you going to give up on online poker altogether, or pick one of the

rooms that's left? There's UB and AP, of course, but I still wouldn't use
them. Good choices left are Bodog, Doyles Room, Carbon Poker, and Cake.
Whatcha gonna do? You can't keep your heads-up title if you can't defend it.

First of all, to The Whore who wrote this, yes I can keep my heads up title!  I will kick ur ass heads up with play money Biatch!  Ahhhhh I had to get that out and I feel better now.  The biatch does make a good point though.  I suppose I could start up a Bodog account.  I'd been thinking about doing just that before Black Friday, but I just don't thinking depositing money into any online poker account during these times is a smart decision.  But like I said, he got me thinking.  If any of you have any thoughts on this I'd be interested to hear them. 

Don't forget that Sunday night is HeffMike's BBT in Exile home game on Poker Stars.  Very Josie is definitely playing and I'm throwing in a bounty.  Winner of the game gets a highly coveted Very Josie T-shirt.  This may be your last chance to get one, for a while anyway.  More than that, it'll be a helluvalot of fun so please join us.

To be continued.....I told Lightning I'd call him at 9pm so I have to pop off and do that.....

Well, I called Lightning but he blew me off!  Can you imagine?  Actually he said something about eating dinner and to call him later but I was getting sleepy, so I went off to bed.  I'll try him tonight.

Play smart.


Thursday, April 28, 2011


Even though it was live poker night at my house last night, I didn't use that as an excuse to skip exercising.  Poker starts at 7:30pm  and I figured I could get everything done before that.  3 sets of pushups, crunches and a variety of free weight exercises and then it was time to hit the hills.  I am still wearing the ShapeUps for this which makes the hike even harder.

I find that my biggest complaint about walking around Saugus is that everyone is just too damn friendly.  I'm wearing headphones and powerwalking FAST, yet everyone frigging waves to me, says hello or wants to shoot the breeze.  Ugg.  I am NOT a friendly person....for real.  I'm a nice person to be sure.  But striking up conversations with strangers that live in my neighborhood is not me.  Yet it seems that's what everyone around me lives for.  Last night I had cars beeping at me at least 4 times.  After a couple I was ready to give them the finger but on closer look they all seemed to be waving furiously and sincerely and I don't even know these people.  OMFG  This is the stuff that makes me break out in hives.  I do not do well with strangers.

At about the halfway point of my walk, I turn the corner and earlier in the week the owner of the house on said corner said hello to me.  The lucky guy got a smile and half wave back as I strode on.  Couple nights later as I'm walking by he's sitting there in his adirondack chair by his fire pit which was blazing.  Nice.  Again, he got a wave but I didn't break my stride.  I'm here to burn calories people, not make friends.  Last night I was a bit earlier as I wanted to get back in time for poker and I happily noted he wasn't there planted by the fire pit.  I almost make it by his house when I see him hurrying toward me with a load of wood in his arms and he says "Oh I almost missed you!", like I was the first act of a great show.  FML

The way home is the worst because I have to trek up 2 BIG hills and at this point I'm already spent and drenched with sweat.  The end of this hike is never pretty.  I'm halfway up the first big hill and I feel a car right up my ass.  Mother fucker!  I turn around and lo and behold it's Gary!  I'm huffing and puffing but I decline his offer of a ride up the last of the hills.  I got home red, sweaty and early, yet 2 poker guys were already there.  I was hoping to do a quick wash/change before they got there but no luck.

I excuse myself to change my soaking wet tshirt and for some reason I grab Gary's hand and put it on the back of my super sweaty neck.  The look of horror on his face was priceless.

Oh we played 2 games and I split the first one and gary won the 2nd!  We rule!

Play smart.


Wednesday, April 27, 2011

All In

After about 2 months of no exercising I'm back.  My plan is to do both cardio and free weights 5 days per week, and I just kicked it up a notch (or 3) by getting Shecher Shape Ups.  When I wear them it feels a bit like walking on red bull cans so it makes you constantly use your leg and core muscles to keep your balance.  Reviews for them are both positive and negative so I don't know what their impact actually is.  I can tell you that I live on a hill in the middle of a hilly area of Saugus, so walking hills with these shoes is a freaking killer.  I come home drenched in sweat, like it's been downpouring.  As much as it's been killing me (and my knees) tonight I actually went further than I had been and I cut about 2 minutes off, which means I'm going faster!

I just hope it doesn't hurt my already hurting knees.  The fact of the matter is I have no cartilage in my knees so the orthopedic doctor told me to avoid hills and stairs so as not to get my knees acting up.  But he also said to strengthen my leg muscles, which support my knees and that will lessen the pain.  And that's exactly what the Shape Ups claim to do; support joint health by strengthening surrounding muscles.  Besides, Kim Kardashian uses them!  Um, have you SEEN her?  Obv she would be an ugly old cow, were it not for her Skechers Shape Ups.  lol  Last night my knees were inflamed so badly, I could barely walk, but I elevated them, used a little ice and ibuprofen and went out again tonight.  Only one is hurting right now.  :(  I def felt worse last night so I think it's key to keep going.

Work is out of control.  I'm always busy but in addition to my usual stuff, all this other stuff is going on:
1.) It's month end, which is my busy time.
2.) Our fiscal year ends May 31st so its year end too.
3.) Since January 1st we've hired maybe 25% more employees so there are alot more projects going on, which means alot more contracts, meetings etc.  Because I'm so good at saving project multiples all the managers want me to fix their stuff.  I'm working on jobs that are finishing up as well as projects just starting up and it's nuts.  Keep in mind that to be properly ready for a meeting, there are hours of prep work prior to it then hours attending it.   I easily lose days of productivity that are hard to make up. So it's busy but a good busy I suppose.

Also, I've been putting this on the back burner but Red Sox 101 will be starting by next week.  It's an online sports site all about the Red Sox and Gary a/k/a Crafty Southpaw has asked me to be a contributor/sports writer!  Coolio, right?  I've committed to about 4 articles per week, which is nuts, but I'm going to give it my all.

Witch hair - Um, I have jet black hair!  You may think there isn't a big difference between brown hair and BLACK hair, but trust me there is.  HUGE difference and it's all my fault.  I picked the color and it was called "dark chocolate" which I figured meant brown.  NOPE.  Apparently "dark chocolate" is synonymous with "jet black witchy poo hair".

My new look

I've been wearing my hair in a ponytail to minimize the number of black cats following me home.  Oh....and I wore a bruins hat to Seabrook on Saturday night too and that helped.  Have I mentioned my Seabrook trip?  No?  Have I mentioned poker poker poker?  No?  Well I'll tell you all about it in my next post.  Although 5 minutes into the tourney the man sitting in the 7 seat (I was in the 6) peers down beneath the bill of my cap and says "Is that you?"  Hmmm......I answer "Yes, I think it's me" with a laugh.  He said he recognized me but forgot my name and asked why I hadn't been around in so long. 

It was a 4 table tourney and even though I had 15k at first break (we started with 10k) I was out before the final table.  Hell, I was out before it was down to 2 tables.  I played 2 critical hands that didn't go my way.  I went completely on my reads, which were sound, but then got rivered.  TWICE.  Such is poker.  I promise to get into the details of those 2 critical hands in my next post.  It's getting late, my knees is starting to demand attention, I'm dog tired and I have a couple of other pokery things I want to mention.

Poker Stars is paying off people's cash accounts!  Woot!  I had about $2 in my Poker Stars account so I didn't give a fark about PS paying out until I read JamyRocksHawk.  His post said they were paying out the SCOOP tickets too!  OMFG! So instead of getting two bucks I'm getting a little over $250!  Woot!  That frigging rocks!  Hopefully Full Tilt will soon follow suit.  I worry that they haven't yet and hope it isn't because they don't have enough liquid assets (cash money) to pay out all those US donkeys.

Speaking of Donkeys.......HeffMike is holding a private home game on Poker Stars Sunday night, for all of us who've been jonesing to play together. All the details are on his blog and I will post more info towards the end of the week.  Peeps, Very Josie will be in this game and in rare form.  So fucking what if it isn't for money.  Some things are priceless.  Come on and play for old time's sake but do not knock me out!  Don't forget that I can cast spells now!  Poof! and I'll turn you into a frog! Need more incentive to play HeffMike's home game?  The winner gets......A Very Josie T-shirt!  So there is something at stake people!  You may never get another chance to win one!

Play smart.


Tuesday, April 26, 2011


I swear I was going to write an uber long post last night about how I'm crazy busy in work, I'm so sore I can barely walk, and I even have poker stories!  Oh....and I have something in common with Kim Kardashian! Since I'm waaay to busy in work right now, that's what I was going to do last night, but I got too tired and went to bed early again.

I have an overly booked day today in work, so much so, I've even been getting to work early which is really unheard of.

So tonight, I'll write a too long post giving you all the details (most likely tmi) of the following:

1.  Poker stories
2. Work stories
3. Oh my aching knees story (not a monica lewinksy story)
4. What I'll be doing with Heff on Sunday night (again not a monica story heh)
5. What I have in common with Kim Kardashian.
6. My new BLACK hair.

And much, much more!

Play smart.


Tuesday, April 19, 2011

It's Okay Tuesday

I got this idea from Airing My Dirty Laundry.  Every Tuesday she does a post called "It's Okay Tuesday" where she'll list a bunch of things to be okay about. You're welcome to join in and do something like this.  Doesn't have to be on a Tuesday either.

It's okay.......

1. That I didn't love Black Swan even though Natalie Portman is one of my favorite actresses.

2. To be extra bitchy crabby when I have my period.

3. To overshare about said period.  :)

4. That I have never seen a Star Wars movie and don't want to.

5. To snicker whenever I hear the word twitter.  It's the word my sister and I have used for years for va-jay-jay, so that will always be twitter's first definition in my mind.  Hee hee.

6. To not have any desire to twitter.  Heh.  The word is cracking me up!

7. That I have not been on facebook in months.  I usually lose interest in such things very quickly.

8. That I don't miss online poker.  Really, I don't.  What I do miss is the pleasure of interacting with friends and swearing at them too. 

9. To prefer to read at lunchtime at my desk instead of being social in the lunchroom.  I get that it's not as much fun without me but.....

10. To be angry that I was just told I have to attend a big mediation meeting on FRIDAY AFTERNOON 3-5pm.  We designed the new courthouse in Fall River MA, and there are many unpaid additional services that have to be resolved.  I have a couple of days to get all my ammo ready for the fight, but why on Friday afternoon?  As I'm going to be heading up our side, why didn't the project manager check with me to see if I was available?  Oh and I know it won't end at 5pm.  Hmmm maybe it will as we're meeting with the Comm of Mass Division of Capital Asset Mgmnt.  State employees do not like to work overtime.  They do however, LOVE paper documention, which they are going to get in spades.  Um, refer to Item #2.

11. To feign interest in Boss' Passover seder while thinking "Oooo new Deadliest Catch is on tonight."

12.  To be overly happy that my fave housewives, The Real Housewives of New Jersey, have a new season starting in May.  Yay!

It's all okay!


Monday, April 18, 2011

What I did this weekend

You know I wasn't playing online poker right? 

I slept.  All.  Weekend.  Long.

I've always read that you can't like live on too little sleep and then try to make it up all at once.  It doesn't work that way, or does it?  I was overly tired all week long, but had a good 8 hrs sleep on Friday night.  Got up for a while on Saturday and then went right back to to bed and slept until my sister came over at 6pm and out we went.  Home by 9pm and back to bed by 11pm.  Then I slept till 10am.  Between Friday night and Sunday morning I slept for 23 hrs.  I shiat you not.  And that is soooo not me but I obv needed it.

Hmmm what else is going on? Ummmm not too much....

Red Sox are actually on a 2 game winning streak!  Woot!  And are playing as I write's hoping for the hat trick!

Oh and the Boston Marathon is going on too.  Very exciting stuff if you're watching (or running ) but not so much if you're stuck in work.  I'll catch snippets on the news, but it's just not the same.  If I was home on Patriot's Day I'd have the race on TV from start to finish....keeping my eye on those Kenyans.  lol 

Marathon running is such an incredible example of endurance which I find fascinating and inspiring.  Too bad marathon sleeping isn't a sport.  You can be sure I'd be one of the "elite" sleepers.  I can see it now.  Me, with sleep wrinkles on my cheek, a bit of drool running down, as the camera pans on me. 

"Can she make endure the 26.2 miles hours of sleep?  Word on the street is she just did 23 hrs last weekend on a whim!"


PS.  My thoughts are with the bloggers and peeps in the Carolinas.  Hope you all are safe, especially TripJax and Muchtim.  I heard North Carolina was hardest hit.  Boo!

Friday, April 15, 2011


One man did it, and he did it while taking care of a silly baby.  HeffMike kicked my ass.  Notice the choice of words?  I didn't say he winned, I said he kicked my ass, and for good reason.  We played best of 5 and he won the first 3 games.  Freaking shut out.  OMFG.  I battled away but I just wasn't on my game and I wasn't playing like I usually did.  Instead of taking control, as I like to do, I just laid there and took it.  So not me.  Neo Baby was railing and even commented how I didn't seem like myself...I wasn't even really trash talking.  I dunno.  All I know for sure is that HeffMike sucks donkey balls.  That and I will give him a link here for the next 5 days.  Blah.  FWIW HeffMike is a fine poker player, but wasn't anything special HU, getting in baaaad as much as good, but the cards just fell his way.  Couple that with my shitty playing, and I am dethroned.  I know I should be more gracious that this, especially considering I really respect Heffy's game, but I dunno. I should've beaten him HU.  My HU play failed me again later on btw....a fail that hurt as much as being dethroned.

Let me give you a quick recap of the night though......

I made my sister a birthday cake when I got home.  A (hopefully) yummy triple layer lemon cake with the most luscious filling topped with a chocolate sunflower. (handmade by me) Then....

I played the Booze Cruise with smBoatDrinks last night, which was a limit H/L Omaha game and I came in 3rd - ITM!  I won $6, but it cost me $5.50 to play.  Alot of fun as usual.  Oh and guess what?  Not only is today my sister's birthday, it's also SmBoatDrinks birthday AND Boaty's brother's bday too!  How weird is that?

Happy Birthday Boaty!

When Sumo (Boat's bro) told me about their shared bday I assumed twins (bestill my beating heart) but no.  They are 10 years apart.  Hmmmm one is 32 and one is 42....

Then I lost the HeffMike HU challenge.....Grrrrr I will crush him!

Then I decided it was time for some satellite playing.  I could only find one. $24 game and winner gets the $216 token, and 2nd place got like $48.  Like 12 peeps.  I did my thang, and took people out like I do.  I was first or second for the entire game.  Fast forward 2 hrs later and we are HU.  Winner gets the big prize 2nd place gets a tiny, why waste your time prize.  Going into it I had more chips than him and yet, I lost HU.  Even though I had the chip lead.  Big diff between $216 and $48 dammit.

See below.

Below are a couple of pictures of my sistah's cake.  I made the sunflower out of chocolate one petal at a time.  I dunno if I like the look but I know it'll taste amazing. 

At first the base of the cake was going to look like a terracotta flower pot and I was going to fill it with small flowers, but I took the easy way out.  Blah.  Not just because this was easy, but because I was worried that a giant terracotta pot might not look appetizing. 

Oh and congrats to Lightning, who I railed as I was playing my satty.  He came in 2nd place in a 50+ peep game and played AMAZINGLY. (Personally, I am amazed that I just typed that sentence but I have to call them like I see them). 

Happy Birthday Cricket, Boaty and Sumo!!!



Thursday, April 14, 2011

Funniest line ever

If you've played poker with me, you know that when my ire is up, I'll throw and insult or two in the chat box.  If you win a hand (and that's a big "if") you might be favored with a "biatch" "mo fo" "omfg" or something similar.

Last night when I was playing the first heads up game with Jordan the chip lead kept going back and forth.  Ugh.  As soon as I got the lead, he'd take it away.  He'd done this more than once, so it was time to get my trash talking powers in effect.  I called him what I reserve for the most special of male players.

"Whore!"  I said..  Let the verbal abuse begin!

His answer.......


ROFL LMAO  He answered to "whore" like it was his name.  Funny bastard.

Play smart.

Currently reading Blue Shoe by Anne Lamott

Heads Up with Jordan

Sweeeeet, wonderful YOU,

You make me happy with the things you do,
Oh, can it be so,
This feeling follows me wherever I go.

I never did believe in miracles,
But I've a feeling it's time to try.

I never did believe in the ways of MAGIC,
But I'm beginning to wonder why.

Don't, don't break the spell,

It would be different and you know it will,
You, you make POKER fun,
And I don't have to tell you, you're not the only one.
Oooh . . . YOU make poker fun. It's all I wanna do.
Oooh . . . YOU make poker fun. It's all I wanna do.
Oooh . . . YOU make poker fun. It's all I wanna do.

Jordan and I finally hooked up for our Heads Up challenge.  The parameters were best of 5 games.  Jordy requested turbo and $11 buy in.  The first game lasted quite a while as I got used to Jordan and his patterns, but soon enough I hit trips and parlayed that into a win.  Then I won game 2 and shortly thereafter game 3.  3-0 Very Josie FTW!  I offered Jordan the chance to maybe win a game :) but he said he was done.  Jordan is now just another notch on my lipstick case.  lol  It was really alot of fun playing Jordan heads up.  He is really a great and thoughtful competitor who was very challenging.  Rematch any time Jordan!

So with my new found $33 courtesy of Jordan, burning a hole in my balance, I decided to play a bigger game.  I played a $50 satellite game where the top 7 peeps get $216 tourney dollars and 8th place got $138.  There were about 35 people.  I chipped up early, surprise surprise, but this time I held onto my chips.  I obv play differently if I'm not playing to win.  Here I'm playing just to last to 7th place and dammit, that's exactly what I did.  Woot!  Yummy tourney dollahs for Mama!

In the hand above J-10 raised pre and I jammed all in.  When he called and I saw his hand I was certain I was doomed.  (Who CALLS an all in with J-10 btw.  Not even me!)  When I saw the 10 on the river I thought I was beat.  Didn't see my pretty full house for at least a minute.  Doh!

Winner!  Thank you Jordan!  I never would've played this if not for you.

I lost the daily dollar, just a hair short of the bubble, but no matter, still a profitable evening. 

Play smart like....

Jo C.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Alright - There IS one more name

There's one more name that I didn't like, but I was called this the entire summer I was 10 yrs old.  It may explain why A.) I never like getting my hair cut and B.) why I don't like being called boys' names.

Oh and there's definitely no poker content here, perhaps no content at all.  :)

As a little girl, from like the age 5 and on, I'd always had very long, waist length hair.  Always.  My mother would cut my bangs every few months but the mane was left to grow.  This was a problem because I was a bit of a tom boy - always running and playing outside so my hair was always tangled.  Ouch!  We never had conditioner which would have fixed everything.  Nope, just shampoo and alot of brushing and combing by my mom afterwards.  That part sucked and I always complained very loudly about it.

In response, my mom always threatened to cut all my hair off, which pretty much shut me up.  Since she'd threatened it so much, I didn't really take her seriously. (mistake #1) The summer I turned 10 she told me she was taking me to a hair salon.  Dante's Salon in Everett, MA to be exact.  I'd never had my hair done at a salon before so I was more than a little excited. (mistake #2)

I was sitting in the chair that spun round and round and having a great time, while my mom chatted privately with Dante about what I was having done.  I didn't care; this was cool! (mistake #3)

He cut ALL of my hair off.  I went from having hair hanging below my waist to having the world's shortest BOY'S hair cut.  Honestly, most of the boys in my neighborhood had longer hair than mine.  It was ubershort, spiky and kinda sticking up, like a long crew cut.

I swear to God, I left with my hair no longer than the photo above, and most likely shorter than that.  He gave me a very short boy's regular hair cut.  OMFG.  Mom said it looked good and off we went home.  I didn't even cry.  Not then anyway.

I lived in a very big 2 family house with lots of kids.  I got  home and one of those kids said I looked like "Paul".  Paul was a neighborhood boy who was about 3 yrs younger than me.  As I was small for my age, we were about the same size.  Then someone else called me Paul, and it stuck.  It was "Paul, you wanna play kickball?" 

The next day I went out to play and sure enough Paul was out playing too.  Back then all of the kids in my area just all played together.  They were mostly boys and me.  The older girls didn't play outside and get dirty.  Anyway, all the kids really started calling me Paul once we were side by side.  Paul was a handsome boy and I guess I was too.  FML.  All summer long, when I got up to bat, "Go Paul, Go".

It was bad and I blamed my mother, who blamed me for not taking better care of my hair.  Blah.

Later that summer we took a family vacation to New York City and there are photos of me in NY, wearing a baby blue polyester jumpsuit and with hair shorter than Winona's.  Damn, I did look like Paul.  Or maybe Paul looked like me!  I refused to get my hair cut for years afterwards. 

I guess there are worse names than Joe C., like Paul.

Jo C


Perhaps you've read his post, but DO NOT LISTEN TO Wawfuls.  The guy is delusional.  Do NOT change any linkage.  My name is Very Josie, or Josie, my friends call me Jos, my family calls me Jo.  Hmmm let's see, what else?  Gary calls me Douche Bunt, which is a combo of douche bag and the c-word.  Ain't he a gem?

The lesson to be learned here is that you can call me all the stuff noted above.  What not to call me is Joe C, even though my last name surely does start with a C. 

I've also been called Josie Lungs because of my amazing lung capacity.  I shiat you not.  You can hold a flame across a vast expanse of horizon and feel the wind as I blow it out without much effort.  Ahhh the talents I have that you don't even know about!

Other names I've been tortured with over the years, include Squashy Face, courtesy of my sister. Can I help it if I have some serious cheeks? That one used to make me cry and cry.  Anyway, don't bully me like my older sister.

Speaking of bullies, Wawfuls is quite the name caller, isn't he?  Don't listen to him.  He's just jealous because I was giving Boat's brother, and Muchtim and Wolfie (and everyone else who wasn't Waffles) a little verbal massaging.  Wah Wah.  I had nothing else to do because......

Because.....I didn't have the HU match with Jordan. Boo! It's being rescheduled to most likely tonight.  If I have live poker at my house, it may have to wait till Thursday.

So....I railed that biatch you know as Sir Waffucktard, then I played 3 games.  $10 (45) person game with Jew Boy. (I lost) A $6 satty with 30 peeps and only one getting entry to $120 tourney. (I lost) And then...

$10+1 tourney with a knock out.  88 peeps and I came in 6th.  I would've taken a screenshot but I was too upset when I lost.  I was in first place by the first break and held either 1st or 2nd for the rest of the game.  I never donked off chips and played strong and hard.  In the end I played the hammah which was my undoing.  I bet it to the river and the villian had nothing till he caught middle pair on the river and called my huge final bet.  My read was right throughout, but in hindsight, perhaps no more betting on the hammer post flop if I haven't connected.  6th place gave me a decent cash though.

Play smart.

Jo C.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Heads Up with Pokah Dave

Very Josie and Pokah Dave

Davey boy and I had a little heads up challenge tonight.  Davey boy a/k/a DDionysus a/k/a DoubleD is a better than competent player so I knew I had my work cut out for me.  I played my usual aggressive way and even though I chipped up early, soon enough I'd lost game one.  Doh! wtf!  Not to worry, I thought.  Onto game 2.

Game 2 was going great until I lost a couple of small pots and the chip lead.  Meh, no biggie.  But then I played A-6.  Btw if you're playing heads up, you HAVE to play ace rag.  Statistically it's most likely the best hand preflop, so there wasn't the luxury of folding.  Anyway, I caught an ace on the flop.  Neither of us bet. (both of us were being tricky) Small bet on the turn, which I  called.  River was a 6!  I bet and he jammed all in.  I called and found out he'd flopped trips.

I was down 2 games to zilch.  omfg.  We'd chatted about playing maybe 5 hu matches, but nothing set in stone.  I was going to need to win at least the next 3.  Talk about being in a hole.

Not only did I win the next 3 games, but I won the next 4 games in a row.  Yep.  Poetry in motion baby.  Of course I caught a few lucky rivers, but there was plenty of good poker playing too (on both our parts). 

At the end it was VJ 4, DD2.

On the very last hand of the very last game, I had my very favorite hand:  JT.  Now I already had a big chip lead and I led out raising.  DD jammed and I called.  Flop was AKx and then I caught the Q for broadway.  GG Davey!  I offered him another rematch but his response was "Uncle!".   Dave, it was alot of fun playing with you and trash talking you.  :)  Seemed like each game there was a battle for the chip lead.  Damn, but didn't we trade those chips back and forth?

4 in a row baby!  What a comeback.  After those first 2 games I was dreading writing this post.  :)  Now, not so much.  All I can say is variance, schmariance.

My next victim worthy opponent is Jordan of High on Poker fame.  I just emailed him to see if he could play Tuesday night, if he isn't too afraid, that is.  :)

Tonight (Monday night) I'm going to my first Red Sox game of the season.  Woot!  The sox are playing Tampa Bay.  I won't be seeing Manny as he just shot up roids retired, but Johnny Demon should be there to hear me booing him. 

I usually don't go to games in April because I don't like the cold weather, but tomorrow night is supposed to be very mild and it's a free ticket from work.  You just can't beat free tickets and most likely free Fenway Franks.  If anyone else has any free Red Sox tickets for me, drop me an email.  :) 

It'll be great to be back in Fenway after the long winter.  Anyone know who's pitching?

Play smart and Go Sox!


Friday, April 8, 2011

Feelin' Lucky

Yesterday was not a good day.  I was working on about three hours of sleep, I'm on a diet which makes me a wee bit cranky, and the Red Sox lost 1-0 after Lester pitched 7 scoreless innings.  In addition to all that, I'd had it "up to here" with being called a luckbox. 

I mean many times can dozens of guys, who I thought were intelligent, wax on about what a luck box I am?  I started thinking "Do these guys actually believe this?"  All along I thought everyone was kidding around.  Heck, I don't even "believe" in luck.  I see those people with "lucky" card protectors, or wearing their lucky t-shirts and I think "idiot", although maybe idiot isn't fair.  If these insignificant things make people a little more confident, then God bless them, go to it.  I just do not buy into the "luck" thing.

I believe in "randomness" as in randomly you'll get better cards and worse cards.....ebb and flow, but not "tonight's my lucky night so I will win win win".  You guys aren't stupid enough to believe that shit, are you?  If you are, I am sorely disappointed.

I've been called "lucky" far longer than any of  you have known me.  In fact, I wrote a bit on my thoughts about this subject last summer and below is an excerpt.

Very Josie - On Gambling and Luck, August 2010
Luck wins hands. It does not win tournaments.  And what the fuck is wrong with a little luck anyway?
In a poker room if you call someone lucky, you might as well just call him a mother fucker to his face. He'll take it the same way you meant it. As an insult.  In other facets of life, "lucky" isn't such a dirty word.

I cannot tell you how often I've been called lucky. Certainly much more often than I've been called smart. And I am lucky sometimes. When a little luck goes my way I'm thankful and try not to squander it. It isn't total luck. I make my own "luck" and everyone tells me how lucky I am.

Whatev. Some old guy from Illinois, after writing I was lucky about 19 times in his "open letter" to me even brought it up a notch, saying I'm screwing the honchos at Full Tilt.  Maybe even he doesn't believe it can be luck must be the magical mystery vay jay jay that I have.  lollllllllllll

Sooooo when I was going through the archives to find that little tidbit above, I found a piece I wrote on Hoyazo, like way back when.  He kicked my butt and clearly I didn't like it, yet I was impressed.  (no I never typed the "luck" word even once in reference to him)  :P  See below.

Very Josie - Who is this "Hoyazo" that just fucked me? September 2010
I just busted out of The Mookie. Small field, 13 players I think, which means 2 small tables. I have Hoyazo one away, to my left. And whenever I'm in a pot he raises or reraises and I end up folding a couple of hands that may have been the best, but not worth the tourney.
So I have my fave hand and raise 3 times the blind or 180. Hoy reraises to 710. Big blind folds, I fold and he shows a 7-2....The Hammer. This is after fucking with me repeatedly.
Next hand I have A-Q sooted. Hoy raises to 180, bb reraises to 540. I call. Hoy jams all in and BB folds. I know I gotta fold here, but I keep thinking about that last hand and the hands leading up to it.
I call.
He shows KK. Flop is Q high, but I catch no other cards and I'm out.
Here's what I think. Had he waited till after the flop to jam with an over pair, I'd still have all my chips in. That's be a much easier call. It just pisses me off that his fucking with me resulted in me making a bad call.
The funny thing is he played exactly how I play. Usually I'm very aggressive, like him. If you're telling me your hand is worth 3x the big blind, well then you're also telling me that it isn't worth, say 10x. So let's put you to the test. It's an easy way to accumulate chips and it's best done against a tight player. And damn, there's nothing I like better than getting a big pocket pair after a hand I've just raised.
No, I'm not a tight player, but I don't think Hoy knows that, and I certainly appeared tight tonight. I didn't get many playable hand so all I seemed to do is fold, or fold afer Hoy reraised me.
Very interesting. I wouldn't mind playing with him at my table again.

That was about about 7 months ago, and I can't say I've done anything significant against Hoy yet, but hopefully there's the BBT6 coming....

Speaking of is the WSOP. Vegas in June baby.  A very NICE blogger sent me an email yesterday explaining why all you other bloggers call me names.  He made alot of sense and then he asked if he'd see me in Vegas for teh WSOP.  I really hope the answer will be yes.

I need a BIG "lucky" win so I can leverage that into a wsop win.  I would like that very much, if only to continue the "Luck Box" reputation. I think the best way to accomplish this (online anyway) is to play a large tourney with large prizes at the final table.  That's where you'll find me for the next month or so.
Play smart.

Jo C.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Miami Don can handle Asian women, but not Sicilians!

Miami Don's a good boy....

After The Very Josie (much more on that in a bit) Miami Don challenged moi to a heads up match.  Now I tried to tell him that he didn't know who he was dealing with.  Heads up I'm like Mohammad Ali....I float like a butterfly and sting like a bee!  But he insisted.......

So we played a gazillion heads up matches.  Now you'll see on his blog how he brags about banging old asian ladies, but what you won't see on his blog is any bragging about pwning Sicilian ladies.  Cuz I spanked that big mo fo.  Maybe I needed a step ladder to get the job done, but I have a feeling it's gonna hurt Donnie to sit down this morning.

We played Eight (8) heads up matches.  And I won 5-3, and quite frankly I probably should've won more.  There was a point when I just could not lose a hand,  Flopping 2 pairs was par for the course.  It was awesome.  The amazing part was that Don lasted as long as he did. (that's what she said)  He does have the ability to fold second best hand over and over again with out investing too much in a loser.  I wish I had that kind of discipline and hope to someday.  When he had K-K and I had J-7 the flop was J-7-x natch.  Rinse and repeat.

Mind you I tried to tell him that he couldn't beat me heads up, but did he listen?  No!  In fact, he even wants to do it again.  What do you call guys that like to get punished?  Oh yeah, you call them MIAMI DON.  :)

GG baby, as you know.  Each game (except one) was a long term battle won inch by inch and a helluva lot of fun.  For some reason I got angry more even though I won more.

I remain the Queen of Heads Up matches and wonder who would like to get spanked next.  Just remember, Don is the winner of WPBT and I'm better than him! Hoyazo, are you quaking in your boots?  Drop me a comment if you think you can do what Don could not.

The Very Josie


I chipped up and became the early chip leader.  I was adding and adding to my stack and by the first break I had about 10K and 2nd place had maybe 5K.  Then I worked that up to 13K.  Then JoelPokerGod came along and the whole thing fell apart.  I really stopped playing my game and tried to play his which resulted in me spewing chips.

I'd flopped top pair and by the turn I still had top pair and a straight flush draw.  He jammed all in with 2nd biggest stack and I called.  Why?  Because it's JoelPokerGod and I know how aggressive he is.  He'll do that with the nuts or with nothing.  I called him and he had 2 pair.  The river was a club which game me my flush but I didn't quite understand why my chips were being shipped to Joel, until it dawned on me that the card that gave me the flush also gave him a full house.  Doh.

Then I played like crap, neutralzing all the good player earlier in the game.  When I cashed in 3rd, instead of sending me a gg Wolfie said "You played at the end so badly I won't even give you a gg.  you just gave Joel all your chips."  Worst part is he's right.  I won't soon forget that comment. Blah

I did better than Wolfie though and about 14 others.

Joel won,  and Lucky Duck played a solid TIGHT game that had him sliding into a deal for 2nd, once they got rid of the riff raff Very Josie in third place.

With 17 peeps it was a good sized 2 table game. I was focused on my table and my cards.  At the other table someone said something ignorant and hurtful that offended Bam Bam.  I mean really?  WTF It's a $10 game.  There's no reason to offend people and make enemies over a few bucks or even an injured ego.  We've all been there.  I wish people could learn to lose with a little class, and no I'm NOT the pot calling the kettle black.  I will pepper my chat with a omfg, or biatch, but if you've spent ANY time playing with me you know there's no mailiciousness behind it and I'm just there to have fun.  There is no reason to be hurtful.  Someone owes Bammer an apology and I'll be the first in line because I am truly sorry this happened at my game.It was upsetting news to read after looking forward to this game all month.

Waffles, since you were doing all your whining at my table, I'm going to assume it was not you.

Play lucky.


Wednesday, April 6, 2011

The Very Josie & The Definition

These are actual definitions from the urban dictionary.

1.) Cool or awesome, used to emphasize a good quality about something
"How very!" or "Come on, Heather, it'll be very."

2.) Another variation of teenage slang meaning tight, chill, sweet, awesome, cool, etc.

the show to night will be so very

1.) The head sexy girl (as in Josie and the Pussycats). The alpha female in any group of hotties. The decision-maker for any group of popular, sexy girls. Usually not very nice, but always a dime. Boss bitch.

2.) A sexy girl, who loves to spend time with guys. a girl who doesnt care much about money but she loves things that comes from the heart.

that girl's so sweet! shes such a Josie!

So now you know the meaning of The Very Josie:  It's a cool, awesome, sweet poker game hosted by the head sexy girl, a boss bitch, a girl who loves to spend time with guys.  Damn, those urban dictionary people hit the nail on the head!

Play The Very Josie tonight!  Password is pokerbaby and I'm already registered so all you have to do is find me to find the game.  It starts at 9pm sharp - no late registration so be there or be square.

I'm putting a $10 bounty on the last person who enters the game so I suggest you register early.  ;)  Yes, I'm usually not very nice, but always a dime. (wtf does that mean?)

Play smart because this ain't PLO or Triple Draw or any of the 10 dumb games I played last night on the Booze Cruise.  I wonder if HE won, as I predicted HE would.

Just for fun, I looked up some other names in the urban dictionary, and here's what I found.  No, I did NOT make these definitions up. 

"The Heff" is a mythical creature of unknown species that is believed to live in the town of Burnley in England. The only people who have sighted "The Heff" report seeing a mane of bushy hair over the top of a wall, and never any other part of the creature's body. "The Heff" is most commonly sighted in and around the Tesco store in Burnley, but has also been seen in other areas of the town. It is beleived that "The Heff" is male, but as there is no solid evidence for it's existence, this cannot be proved.

The term wolfie refers to how a person feels when they witness something so powerfully awkward, that they themselves feel awkward. The difference between feeling awkward and feeling wolfie is that you feel wolfie when you have taken no part in the actual uncomfortable exchange. These wolfie feelings can be experienced in real life, tv, movies, etc.

When your boss comes in and yells at your office-mate, you feel wolfie.

Used to refer to sexual intercourse in a discreet manner.

Can be substituted by "French toast" to refer to sex with a person of French desent. "German pancakes", "Belgian Waffles", ect.

Person 1: Dude did you get some waffles last night?
Person 2: Yeah man, best waffles I've ever had.

Bam Bam
Nickname given to a fortunate individual by a group of friends, Used only to describe unique personality traits. In turn using an onomatopoeia to title someone worthy of it. Rad person with an urdge to rave til they drop.
WOW Bam Bam! Your personality slaps me in the face like BAM BAM!

The word originally means a charm or a spell. But now its more commonly said meaning sex appeal or talent.
"I can get any girl if I just use a bit of the old mojo" (I believe he's aptly named!)

Hoy: to throw or chuck something

to go out on the hoy, to go out drinking, on the piss, on the lash.
to hoy up, to be sick.

I'm going out on the hoy tonight.
I just hoyed up on my cat.

when u put ur hands together (like ur praying)and thrust at someones gut.

--hurts like hell--

I just lightninged a small orange peel flavored wizard after he force fed my dog a ground up mixture of mango seeds and starfish.

A particularly difficult yet ultimately satisfying bowel movement. (rofl)

That was a hell of a grump I just took.

god of sex and alcohol, definitely my favorite. and screw travis center. (possibly very josie's fave definition! who knew?)

bitches say what? dionysis is here, hell ya

A term used to indicate that someone is "the man." For example, if someone is southpaw, they could kick your ass using only one hand (or "paw), and they most likely engage in numerous sexual encounters (the area down "south") on a regular basis. Most importantly, if someone is southpaw, they are modest about it.
Guiseppi: Dude, you're so southpaw. I wish I could be as cool as you.

a very kind guy, that makes you smile everyday, he gots swag, intelligent, unquie style, sweet words that will make you fall in love
barbie's plastic bitch.
Term refering to the hottest woman in the room.

The coolest kid to walk the earth, a sexy nerd. Guys fall head over heels for her. She loves guys with all her heart. She loves to dance and eat chocolate.

The Wife
When you have a partnership as in a business and all partners are equal but there is always someone who has a little more control than the others and that is the wife of the partnership.

amazingly awesome; best friend material; wal-mart lover; never been fishing; likes cool socks; poptart eater (mmmm poptarts!)

Also an expression requently used by stoners and hippies for something of high quality.

That borritos was dank, man.

The lucky people who are named Joanne are attributed special qualities such as beauty, intelligence and compassion. They are loved by everyone and everything thing. Babies crawl to them and dogs wag their tails. Joanne's are the most adorable people ever. They have the innocent element that attracts all men, but only devotes themselves to one special guy.

And the best for last.....

A different word for very large penis.

Bob has a jordan, and i like to ride it all night long.

Boy, do those urban dictionary people know us or what?  Especially Jordan!

Play smart at The Very Josie!


Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Muhctim, Thy Name is Judas

Things were looking up about 1/3 of the way through the game.  I had my solid alliance with Boat, I had a secondary alliance with Jamy and Muhctim, and I had my back up singers (xkm, turtle) when needed.  I was feeling particularly confident because of Muhctim.  He'd asked me to not let Jamy know that we were in communication.  I happily obliged and why wouldn't I?  He promised me the world. He told me he'd vote whoever I wanted him to vote for.  He told me even if he didn't win, he just wanted to help me get further.

Nice guy huh?  Did I believe it?  Maybe a little.  In the beginning he did just what he said he'd do.  He'd email me asking who to vote for and then he did as he was told.  My kind of guy!  I was happy with how the votes were going, and with who was getting voted off.  I was lulled into a sense of security even though Hoy wasn't buying it. 

The honeymoon was over when Jamy wanted to take out a team fish member.  I just couldn't allow it to happen.  I was finally getting the numbers and the control and knew that sacrificing a fish, even one who wasn't in my inner sanctum was a bad move.  I'd worked the numbers over and over again.  I'm a visual person, so yes I used flash cards.  I shiat you not.  I'd move people/cards round and round trying to figure out alliances I was up against, what the peeps would look like after our vote was made, stuff like that.  So I just couldn't give Jamy what he wanted.  I knew Muhctim was a friend of his, but Muhctim assured me that he would stick with me forsaking all others.  I think he said something like "...for better or worse, richer or poorer....I stick with you."

Since he's sticking with me, I have the numbers to do what I want.  Now I didn't want to appear to my fishmates that I was deciding who got hit (although pretty soon that became apparent).  I didn't particularly want Jamy out at this point, in fact I was pushing for Brain, but acknowledged that Jamy was an issue.  The team wanted to hit Jamy. Muhctim emailed me and asked who should he vote for and my answer was Jamy. 

Muhctim replies and asked me if I had enough votes to get Jamy out without his.  He's developed a friendship and it would "hurt his soul" to vote Jamy.  Certainly understandable.  I reply that I'm good with the votes and he doesn't have to vote Jamy.

I'm playing the game, chatting with this guy and that, and then all of a sudden the penny drops.  Jamy's going to make an attempt to vote me out and MUCHTIM IS VOTING WITH HIM.


Muhctim never said who he was voting for in lieu of Jamy.

The game is still going on as I im Muhctim and ask "Are you voting me???"  Answer was yes and he'd already voted, but only because I told him I didn't need his vote.  Fawk!  How did I go from on top of the world to under a bus in about 5 minutes?  I IM him and tell him I need his help here.  I asked him to PLEASE email Buddy and change his vote to anyone but me. 

The answer................

Silence!  He logged off IM.  That #$%^ *&$%#!!!!!!

Of course him logging off did not stop me from sending him a litany of the nastiest ims/emails with alot of name calling and swear words.  I just couldn't believe it.  Then again I'm sure Jordan, Goat and Hoy couldn't believe it either when it happened to them.  Luckily for me, I squeaked by with enough votes in my pocket so that I wasn't voted out, but it was close.

Bit by bit Judas Muhctim  regained favor with me.  I never fully trusted him again but I certainly needed his vote and he was back to being obedient.  :) Again tons more promises by him, and slowly I started to trust him again.  Always his theme was "You told me you didn't need my vote." 

I continued to play with Muhctim in my back pocket, or perhaps in my cleavage, and things were going great.  Hoy was right that I was picking and choosing who I wanted out.  My plan was Boat and me for final 2 and at this point I promise Muhctim final 3.  Final 3 and final 2 are pretty much the same thing imho.  1 in 3 chance to be in the final 2 so long as you last longest.  That wasn't good enough for Judas though.

Judas Muhctim chose to blind side me again to force a heads up match.  Me against xkm.  Again I was shocked.  Why? I asked.  "Strategy" was the reponse.  I kicked xkm's ass heads up in 24 hands, and of course I got yet another email from Muhctim full of shit congratulations, explanations and this...

"...and you owe me a slap and a hug when I am lucky enough to meet you! (Just remember--However big the slap is, the hug has to be twice as big, twice as nice)"

Heh.  I'll slap him alright.

I never answered that email.  No more curse words, no nothing. I was done.  Fucked over twice was once too many if you ask me. 

Ironically, in the end Muhctim's vote was the deciding vote that gave me the win.  Boat and I were tied 6-6 and we were waiting for one more vote, which was Muhtcim's and he voted for his friend Very Josie, shocking me for the 3rd time in this game.

I'll never understand men, but I'll tell you this: Muhctim has earned his slap and hug.


Monday, April 4, 2011

Sole Survivor

The winner of Survive Donkey Island Season 1 is...Very Josie! 

I did it!  But man what a long night! OMFG Thank God this game is over one way or the other.  I don't think I could take much more physically or emotionally.  The votes were very very close.  As Riggs didn't vote, and both Boat and I couldn't vote, there were 13 voters, which meant no tie. 

At first we were tied 2-2 and then 3-3 and then get the picture.  Soon enough it was all tied up 6-6 with one vote left.  One guy had yet to vote!  He needed to vote and he would be the deciding vote.  I didn't know who it was and at this point I knew it could go either way.  Final vote was for Very Josie though so I won by one vote. omfg And that last vote that gave me the win....guess who that was?  Muhctim.  Yes Muchtim.  After all the curse words and swears I hit him with, he came through for me in the end.  Wow, just WOW. 

There were a few other surpise votes that came my way.  One of them was JamyHawk.  I really thought he wouln't vote for me yet he did and said that I deserved.  That really means alot to me.  Getting votes from HeffMike, Jordan, Hoyazo and Julius Goat also meant alot to me.  I know I got them because of how I played the game.  I also got a vote from Dawn Summers!  Woot!  As I don't know her I didn't really expect a vote from her, but she came through.  I guess Tom Brady fans stick together!

Goat asked me an interesting question that I had to answer and I knew his vote was in the balance.  He asked "Would you rather have a mini Marlon Brando drowning in each one of your drinks or "Marlon Brando free drinks" that cost $100 each?"


At first I answered that I'd take the drinks with the mini marlons and pick them out like they were bugs in my drink, but I was told that I couldn't do that.

Then I asked if Mini Marlon showed up on all drinks like water or just booze.  Turns out Mini Marlon shows up everywhere. Now I couldn't really choose the $100 drinks because when those were drunk marlon would wind up in my belly anyway.


I think I chose the $100 drinks.  Hey that reminds me....Boat and I had a side bet.  First Loser of Survive Donkey Island owes the winner a drink!  Woot!  It's gonna be one of those $100 Marlon Brando drinks! lol

SmBoatDrinks played a great game and it was an honor to play with him.  And I want to send a big thanks out to Julius Goat the creator of this great game.  Even though I'm dead tired I still think that combining Survivor and Poker is a formidable and popular combination.

Season 2 is coming up people.  This is your chance to play yourselves.  Make deals, cut throats, and mebbe sleep with the fishes.  Probably the most fun you'll have with your clothes on.  I highy recommend playing.  You'll have a 1 in 16 chance to do as well as I did.


Thank you Buddy, Joanne, Julius and all my teammates.  We had a helluva good time didn't we?



Sunday, April 3, 2011

Behind the Scenes of Donkey Island

First let me tell you these are my opinions and perceptions which may differ from yours. That being said this is my attempt to accurately document my thought process, my fears, my strategies and everything running through my head during this very long Season 1 of Survive Donkey Island.


I saw the website for Survive Donkey Island over a year ago and immediately became a follower. I’ve watched every episode of every season of Survivor starting with Season 2 and I am a big fan. When I read they were combining Survivor and poker. Well frigging sign me up baby!

I answered a few questions and I was in. I couldn’t wait to see who was on my team. I knew from watching the tv show that I need to make an alliance early on.

My Team                                            Their Team
Josie                                                    HeffMike
SmBoatDrinks                                    Jordan, High on Poker
Turtle                                                  NumbBono
Riggs                                                   Kat
AlCantHang                                        Julius Goat
Xkm                                                   JamyHawk
Hoyazo                                               Muhctim
Dawn Summers                                   Brain

Blah! I was very disappointed to see the teams. Not because of poker prowess and ability but because I didn’t know hardly any of the people on my team. The only one I knew was Riggsstad. He and I’d chatted a bit in the past but he’d been MIA for quite a while. I was thrilled to see his name and thought I’d start with him for an alliance. At least I knew him. Other than him, I didn’t know anyone.

On the other team was HeffMike and Jordan.  These were guys I knew well, genuinely liked and had played with quite a bit. I knew they were good poker players too. And there was NuumbBono! I knew him too. I’d played a few tourneys with him plus we met in Vegas for WPBT and had a great time chatting Friday night.

I mean look at how much fun we were having.  Why couldn't I have him on my team?  I knew he was a good player too. These are the guys I wanted to align with but they weren’t on my team.

I wanted to set the wheels in motion before the game began. I emailed Riggs and got no response. Greeeeaaat. Then I checked out the blogs of some of my teammates and found that SmBoatDrinks had a twice weekly game. I introduced myself and played his game. I think there were 4 peeps and I think I won! Chatted a bit with Boat and asked him if he wanted an alliance all the way. The whole shebang down to the final 2. I promised no shenanigans and no backstabbing. He readily agreed. So before the game started I had my main alliance. It didn’t really matter who it was, but it mattered to have someone.

Shortly thereafter I got an email from Hoyazo….a very loooooooooong email. It talked about keeping the strongest players in the game and would I like to have an alliance with him until the merge. He very specifically mentioned wanting an alliance ONLY until the merge.

As I had only one alliance (boat) I was eager for another. I knew Hoy was thinking that he just needed to make it till the merge, then he’d group with his buddies like Goat and Jordan on the other team. I didn’t mind this. First of all, you have to get through today’s game and the next one. I wasn’t thinking about the merge at this point, I was focusing on surviving the next game and then the next after that. Having another warm body aligned with me was a very good thing. Plus I like how he was honest about not taking me to the end with him. It would’ve been very easy to just say “let’s have an alliance” and then jumped ship after the merge, but he didn’t play it that way. He gave me info instead.

So I agree with Hoy and tell him I have an alliance with Boat. I then suggest he hit up boat for a solid 3 way alliance and he agrees. Should I have told hoy about boat? I duno, but I had nothing to hide, I figured.

I’m liking this solid 3 alliance. I don’t really know how boat plays but I know how Hoy plays. He’s awesome. And wouldn’t you know it but game 1 happens, team fish is sucking ass and hoy is the only one left in the game. There were tons of donkeys in it and a few with more chips. I figure there’s no way our team gets immunity and we’re starting behind. I went to bed early before the game was over. The next morning I woke up and was kinda bummed about our performance and then I thought “Hoyazo….” Could he have done it?

Yes kids, he did! He won immunity for us so we didn’t have to vote. I’m now thrilled with my alliance. Team Donkey votes out NumbBono who’s a good player. Seems like such a dumb move to me. During team play you NEED the strongest players so you prevent your team from having to vote someone off. This is so important because you can’t win if you don’t have the numbers at the merge. Heh – I guess you CAN. ;)

Riggs never showed up. He didn’t show up for game 2 either, so when Team Fish lost immunity Riggs was an easy decision. We voted him out.

Game 3 – At this point I am not calling the shots. I’m laying low and voting with however the team says to. Team fish sucks at this game. Well, all of us but AlCantHang .  It was one of those nights when he just played great poker. I was out early so I was watching him as he was the last Team Fish member fighting for our immunity. He played a great game for HOURS but was outlasted by HeffMike We have to vote someone out. I received a few ims that told me we were all voting Al. WTF! After that game we just played? Why do we want to vote out a strong playa? Dumb move but nothing I can do to change things so I vote with the others. Adios Al! This is the first vote that bothers me.

Game 4: HeffMike puts a $40 superbounty on me just to make things interesting for this game. I don’t remember the game but I do know that I don’t go far. Our plan is to take out Dawn Summers if we have to. I haven’t had any contact with Dawn and don’t know her. I did, however, visit her blog for the first time during the Donkey Island series. She is an amazing writer and was thrilled with what I found there. Funny and poignant, she’s got the goods. Anyway plan is to take her out, but plans have a way of not working out. She gets immunity! Rut roh! Plan b! Hoy suggests Turtle and we agree. I was knocked out early and didn’t realize that I couldn’t vote in the morning. And um, I like my sleep, so I hit the hay while the game is still going on. Dumb, huh? I’ve stayed awake to the bitter end in all subsequent games though. Talk about learning the hard way. Since I didn’t vote, my vote went to ME.

The next morning I open my email and I see an email from Boat saying “Did you vote yet? Get on IM! We need to talk!” sent to me last night. Hmmmmm Then I read Heff’s post saying HOYAZO was voted out. I couldn’t believe it! Wtf! Are we voting off all the strong players? Shiat! Plus this blindside was done without my knowledge. I think that’s a bad sign for me. Usually the person in the dark is the next one voted out, so I do not like this. Boat told me he tried to tell me but I was snoring too loudly dammit!

At this point we are down. There are now 7 donkeys and only 5 fish. We are in a bad way! There are only 2 more team events before the merge.

So now my boy, Hoy is gone. Boooo! My other boy, Boat has made a last minute vote switch without discussing it with me. Oh and our team is down 2 players to the other. I do not like the situation I’m in at all. In fact, it sucks. But then deux ex machina happens and I get an email from JamyHawk.

Mind you I did not seek Jamy out – this just sort of fell in my lap. The first of many emails asks if I want a post merge alliance. He says that if I don’t Team Donkey will just pick off Team Fish (no shit Sherlock). Now why on earth would I say no to that? I have no other propositions so I agree. A lot of wheeling and dealing going on now. Jamy proposes a 4 man alliance, 2 fishes and 2 donkeys with the goal being taking out Julius Goat when the merge happened. I say I’ll bring boat to the table and ask who he’s bringing….and guess who it is? Jordan! I’m in baby! I don’t really think about the repercussions so much as I’m grasping at branches thinking I might be able to stay in this a little longer. I email Boat and tell him it’s time to play the game. I want him to join this secret 4 man alliance when the merge happens and he agrees. I really like this. The possibilities are endless although this means we are going to be abandoning our other fish teammates at some point.

So I was already for this to happen, but then Goat and his donkeys took out Jordan, just in the nick of time. Had he waited for the merge our plan would’ve trumped his. So another shocking blindside with Jordan out and Jamy replaces him with Muhctim. Oh yes, Muhctim. Jamy thinks he’s the go between for Muhctim and me, but Muhctim emails me himself and tells me he wants a super secret alliance. Not in those words exactly, but he says to let Jamy think we don’t talk and he’ll tell me everything he hears on Team Donkey. We've been comminicating via email and im but he says he has keyboard issues and needs my phone number.  Okay.....Damn that man called me alot.  FML I am not a phone person.  I'm just not, but this dude certainly was.  Normally when Gary would call, I'd be polite for 2.2 minutes then bu-bye, but I didn't want to rock the boat with Muhctim so I felt I couldn't blow him off.  Besides he promised me so many things. OMG But enough about that for now...

Now that the Donkeys have voted off Jordan there are 6 donkeys and 4 fish and we’ve merged. If all the fish band together along with Jamy and Muhctim, we can take out Goat or whoever we want. I start getting all our fish in a row and realize I/we can get this done. The thing is, I have no burning desire to take out Goat personally. I really don’t. On the contrary, I rather like him, perhaps more than these donkeys that I've just aligned with but they're with me for one reason, to off him. I dunno what to do. I can’t really email him and say “Goat, tonight you sleep with the fishes unless you take me to the final 2.” I mean that’s stupid. He already has alliances that he will honor. And even if he DOES believe me, once I no longer have the power to take him out will he really take me along with him? Blah – I’m supposed to be playing to win anyway, not concern myself with a guy I barely know. ( a very fucking funny guy – that point cannot be overstated) So I email him….hinting a bit…chatting a bit, without really getting to the heart of the matter. Nothing accomplished. Instead I make hay while the sun is shining and we take Goat out. Huge blindside.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Hoy. I never knew Hoyazo before Donkey Island, but after he got voted off we continued to chat about the game. Usually a post mortem after the game or I’d bounce some strategy ideas off him for a second opinion. He’s an ubersmart man and a great sounding board even though most of his advice was ‘You’re closer to the action than I am, you have to go on your instincts”. Yoda crap like that. He gave me solid general advice throughout (mainly about not donking off chips) and I am indebted to him for that. I would think things out not just for the current game but what the repercussions would be for the next game and so on. I thought of a lot of different strategies and scenarios and tended to bounce most of them off Hoy. He responded to my gajillion ideas and requests and never once was his response “stfu”. Thank you Hoy baby.

Btw Hoy wasn't a huge fan of the alliance with  Jamy/Muhctim.  He had reservations about it.  He thought they would blindside me when I least expected it but in the end I made my decision.  I knew he was possibly right but at that point team fish didn't have the numbers and we had to do something.

Okay what you’ve just read is THE BORING STUFF. This is where it really gets good but I have to make a break somewhere.

Stay tuned for Part II:

Josie verbally abuses guys with words she didn’t even know existed.

TONIGHT IS THE FINAL GAME 9:30PM ON FULL TILT POKER.  Play with us while I last longer than SmBoatDrinks.  He doesn't have a chance.  Password is survive.

Play smart and vote for Very Josie.