Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Heard around the office today

I'm having lunch with my friend Nicole, who says to me "Jenny is going to be Snooki from The Jersey Shore for Halloween.  She needs some really big, gaudy, hoop earrings.  Can she borrow a pair from you?"

OMG  I almost choked on my Diet Coke. Those girls know me too well.  And my answer?  "I have the perfect pair!"

After lunch I'm working away and I hear one of the principals, a much older woman, speaking to a young drafter.  This drafter is an uber religious Mormon, who has such a great personality.  I think I horrify him on a daily basis though.  He just became a High Counselor which is a big accomplishment for his young age...but I keep calling him a High Stakes Counselor.  Oops.

Anyway, I'm working away and it's very quiet in the office until I hear the older woman exclaim to the religious kid, "Andy, that's quite a package you have there!"

I seriously lost my shit over that one.  I peered around to check out said package, and saw it was a big set of plans. 

Mr. Mormon is very cool, with a helluva sense of humor so we get along great, even though he is a pretty strict Mormon, which means no alcohol, no caffeine, no gambling, no swearing....we get along like peas and carrots.  Go figure.

He's pretty low on our corporate ladder so I used to send him to the liquor store to buy beer and wine for our weekly presentation.  Yes, I knew drinking booze was against his religion, but it never dawned on me that buying booze was too. lol Seriously?  That's a sin...even if he's buying it for someone else!  Who knew?  Finally, after he became a regular at our local package store he drummed up the nerve to tell me that being "the booze guy" bothered him.  I felt so bad that I hadn't figured that out on my own.

But not too bad.  He loves to do things like take my breakfast out of the toaster and hide it. (yeah, I love that)  and loads of other practical jokes.  And me?  I really want to make him swear, kind of like how it's a challenge to make a palace guard laugh, but so far no luck. 

He keeps asking me for the URL to this blog, but I am hesitant.  Is this blog about any else than gambling, booze, boobs and swearing? I don't think so! I'm sure that if he read a couple of posts he'd have to relinquish his High Stakes Councilor status.  And we can't have that.

He's invited me to a couple of whatever they are called..."services" maybe.  My answer was "Dude, if I was gonna go to church this weekend, it would be to a Catholic church, not a Mormon one."  

And he's a nice enough kid and all, but even though he's given up being the booze guy, he's still the "lightbulb changing guy".  So I just can't picture him "leading a flock".

Ooooo 2 posts about religion this week!  Maybe this blog is turning around!  Nahhhh

Oh, Waffles was right.  Tennessee won.

Play smart.



lightning36 said...

You're just trying to explain in advance why your cougar tendencies corrupted this poor lad.

Josie said...


DuggleBogey said...

Does this mean you're going to drink lots of diet coke, eat between meals, and be a "bad girl?"

Josie said...

Fucking Right Bogey! LOL Nahhhh

What it REALLY means is I'll still be swearing and drinking diet coke. Other than that, Imma good girl.

Memphis MOJO said...

Tennessee didn't just win, they kicked butt.

Josie said...

Mojo, Boy did they...even with their QB out of the game!