Sunday, November 7, 2010

Week Nine Looks Mighty Fine

Hey Boys,

As you know Waffles and I settled our bet at last Wednesday's Very Josie poker game.  He kicked my butt when he came in 3rd and I came in 4th.  But there is plenty of football left baby!!!

Below are my picks for Week 9.

Click on the pic if you wanna be able to read it

As you can see I am in 2nd place BY ONE POINT.  Whoever said football was a game of inches was damn right.  So I didn't win the halfway pot, but I did win my halfway bet with Adam.  If you look carefully, you'll see that Adam is at the bottom of this page.  There are a few others beneath him, but I couldn't fit them all into the screen shot.  So he's not dead last....but he is dead.  :)

Anyway, Adam and I have another side bet for most points at the end of the year, and since he's almost 100 points behind me, I told him there is no way he can possibly even compete.

Now Adam is a good guy.  He's like 6' 11" (well that's the way he looks from my short point of view) and whenever I rag on him TOO much, he'll stretch his hand high above his head and say to me "High-five Josie!  Jump for it!".  The bastard.  Other than that he's a good kid.  Oh and he has something in common with Waffles....he has GOUT in his toe!  How freaking weird is that?  He's like in his 20's, uber-fit and he has gout.  Go figure.  I'm getting sidetracked though.

So I was feeling bad about the end of year side-bet because there's no way he can catch up, so I offer him a different bet.  I tell him that for the 2nd half, we'll wipe the slate clean and start counting  points with Week 9.  So we both go into Week 9 with 0 points.  He thinks about it for a while...and says NO!

Says he thinks he can catch up and beat me by the end of the year!

He's out of his fricking mind and I tell him so.  I explain that the new offer is nothing but good for him. Then about an hour later he comes by my office and says..."Yeah, let's start the 2nd half with the slate cleaned..."

I agreed.

Unless something catastrophic happens, there's still no way he can win, but at least this makes the bet a little more fun.

Speaking of leagues.....

I played at Lynne's house last night - Black Men and Lesbian league....except there were no black men there!  It's a league than culminates at the Super Bowl.  Only 9 peeps showed up, and the league leader, Marvin, was sick.  This was just the opportunity I needed to move up in the ranks. I'm in 4th place.

I told Lynne that because she was in 2nd and Marvin was MIA, she was going to be my target.  Did I hit my target?  Yes!  I took her out and got a $5 bounty.  That was the good news.  Here comes the bad news.

Such a shitty showing meant only 2 peeps in the money.  So I'm playing away doing my thing, and we are down to 3.  And then I make a boneheaded dumb ass move. 

Blinds are 1k/2k and I am the small blind.  Rick limps on the button, so there is 5k in there.  I am the chip leader with slightly more chips that Rick.  I had maybe 2k more than him.  Anyway, he limps and I look down at Snowmen (8-8).

I KNOW he doesn't have a big hand, and I know I ain't gonna win this post flop, so I jam all in, KNOWING he's going to call.  He hems and haws for a while and finally he calls on the bubble for all his chips.......

....with Ace Nine.

Fuck!  What the fuck did I just do?  I completely forgot that Rick was a total donk.

Flop was 9 high and I was very shortstacked.  Next hand I get is 5-2.  Flop is J-J-2 and I don't have much left so I jam all in.  The other guy calls because the jam was so little.  And he catches runner, runner for a straight.

Bu-bye.  3rd place.  Bubble.  I keep fucking bubbling and not only that, I keep bubbling when I play small/med pairs.  I will drill this lesson into my lovely brain.

Oh and here's the other stupid thing I did.

Um....I think I have a big  problem that I don't know how to solve.  If any of you have suggestions, please lay them on me.

Lynne...Remember, I told her that she was gonna be my target because she was in 2nd place?  I just fuck around with the people I play with.  It's what I doesn't mean SHIT.

I think it meant something to her though....

For the past couple months I've been getting that feeling that Lynne's me.  My expertise lies with men, so I wasn't too sure, but after last night, I'M SURE.

She was flirting with me, in a very very major way.  She was trying to get me drunk, and she kept saying she wanted my attention.  Okay...but her wife was playing - which makes the wifey a little less pleasant.  At the end of the night she pretty much begged me for a back rub...while the wife was in ear shot.

This is NOT good.

I don't want the wife to hate me, and I don't want Lynne know.  I SWEAR I have done nothing to inspire this, other than telling her she's my target, but I meant for POKER.  Ugh.

Lynne knows this guy....she's getting a group together to take a limo up to Foxwoods the week before Thanksgiving, and I'm in!  She says we're gonna get drunk on the way up.  I'm in for that too, but now I'm worried that Wife will definitely be shooting me daggers, and this sux.  I plan on sitting next to the brothers for the ride up.  At this point, they're the safest bet - which is a riot.

So I really wanna go, yet I don't want to deal with the wife.  Who btw is short, kinda plump and has dark brown hair.  Sound like anyone we know? (I'm much more attractive though)

So what do I do? 

Besides, playing smart?



lightning36 said...

I just figure you are setting us up for the threesome post. Lord knows what might happen in Las Vegas with Waffles and Wolfshead ...

Josie said...

The only way they're getting a threesome is if you join them. I know bout you catholic guys....

lightning36 said...

Touche! lol

SirFWALGMan said...

My advice: Take lots of pictures! I want to see. :P.