Wednesday, June 29, 2011


Dinner at Kelly's.....was an adventure.  Normally Evan doesn't like Kelly's food as he's not into fried fish or roast beef but he was thrilled to go because he'd heard that they had "Coca-Cola Freestyle".  Ever hear of that?  It's a self serve soda machine with a twist.  First you pick your soda, like Sprite Zero and then you pick what you want to flavor your soda with.  You can add peach, strawberry, orange, vanilla, lemon, lime - a multitude of flavors, and if there's anything Evan likes better than flavors, it's pushing buttons, and here he got both.  But the thing is, Evan doesn't drink soda.  No coke, no sprite, no mountain dew or gingerale; nothing!  Luckily you were able to add flavors to iced tea and high-C so he was all set.  He got an orange vanilla Hi-C.  Ugh.  I cannot imagine how frigging sweet that was, but he liked it.

Anyway, we had this nice young boy who looked about 15 years old waiting on us.  I thought he looked just like Freddie Benson from ICarly. (if you don't know who freddie benson is then god bless you - you obv don't have kids) In fact he looked soooo much like Freddie Benson (see photo below) I said "Wow, you look like Freddie Benson.  Has anyone ever told you that before?"

Kelly's server and Freddie Benson look alike.  Yes I took a picture of him, but I asked permission first!

The read Freddie Benson

So the kid answers by telling me that people tell him he looks like Mario Lopez.  MARIO FRIGGING LOPEZ!  I don't think so.  The kid's cute and all but Mario Lopez is  MARIO LOPEZ!  Most possibly the world's most beautiful man.  (see photo below)

Holy Moly! Look at those dimples!

Obv the boy is delusional.  I told him that he wasn't at Mario Lopez status yet, but maybe someday........

Anyway, at dinner Gary regalled us with stories of the man taking a poop in the men's room, recounting every sound he heard.  And then he started in with the dirty jokes.....

"An Iranian woman is in the market place and picks up 2 big potatoes and said they reminded her of her husband's testicles.  Is that because his testicles are that big?, her companion asked. "No, because his testicles are that dirty" she replied.


That was pretty much the highlight of the dinner conversation.  I must say that it didn't effect Evan's appetite.  Quite the contrary.  Mr. Finicky Eater ate like 3 times as much as he normally does!  I guess that happens when you don't eat lunch.  :)

Duty calls!  I better go do some work.



lightning36 said...

I would LOVE to tell that joke to the Iranian worker in my office, but the political correctness police are always a concern. I think she would like it, though.

Josie said...

You could always change it from an Iranian woman to an Italian woman and the joke would still read well.

lightning36 said...

Ahhh, but when you are male you do not dare make a joke about sex with any woman at work unless you are 100% sure you are safe in doing so. And I mean 100%.

Gary said...

Well here's another joke I told Ursa Sucrosum over dinner:

Thelma's been at the old folks home for a few years and she decides she wants a little action, so she rummages around in her dresser and finds a pair of crotchless panties, and puts them on.

She goes into the dayroom and goes up to a friend of hers and says "Joe! You want some of this?"

Joe says "Hell no! Look what it did to your underwear!"

Perhaps you can tell that one to your Iranian coworker, unless s/he's over 80.

Josie said...

Yeah that crotchless panty joke was gross.

Gary kept asking Evan if he knew what crotchless panties were and Evan replied yes, but I knew he didn't. Ugh.

The Neophyte said...

OMG Josie, do you want to borrow my glasses? That kid looks exactly like a young Mario Lopez. Freddie Benson? He looks as much like Freddie Kreuger.